Only For So Long
by Kitty Caesar
Summary: "Even though I really loved you, do you know why I ended up leaving? I could take it only for so long before I was about to break. So I left before I broke, before I died." KaiJou. Ficlet. Complete.
1. Part One

Disclaimer: I don't own any part of Yuugioh. I only own my ideas (and my YGO DVDs).

Pairing: Seto/Katsuya (kind of?)

Warning: Ficlet, Shonen-ai, very slightly OOC?

Timeline note: This ficlet is set about 10+ years after YGO:DM.

Author Note: I wrote this about one year ago, and at the time I had been reading some awe-inspiring fanfics that had put me in a mood to write some sort of angsty piece. So this was the result: a ficlet that is broken up into 3 parts! Hope you all enjoy~

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><p><strong>Only For So Long<strong>

Part One

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><p>I haven't seen the man standing before me in over six years.<p>

I thought that I would be angry, or at least indifferent, if I were to ever see this man again.

I thought that I had given up caring.

I was wrong.

Joseph Wheeler stands before me, drawn up to his full height. Which is now rivaling my own.

The blond's facial features still look young and carefree, like he hasn't aged a day. And I can't decide if that relieves me, or depresses me.

He looks to the side, rustles a hand though his hair and leans against the ornate marble railing. And then I notice it. His hair and clothes have changed. They have become richer in color, more refined, more put together. And more expensive. Totally opposite of what he used to look like. Totally opposite of what he used to wear, be. He almost reminds me of someone: me.

Also his skin looks softer and darker. And then on closer inspection his jaw seems to be sterner and more set than I could ever remember.

And all of this looks _really_ good on him.

I silently curse to myself and close my eyes for a second, taking a quick breath. I could handle my ex-lover looking exactly the same. I would be able to reject anything and everything that would be coming from the other man if he looked the same. I would even be able to try to forget about him again.

But this new Joey was just that. New.

And as I open my eyes it dawns on me: This man was starting to intrigue me, the great Seto Kaiba, again. And more than I would like to admit. These changes are making me want Joey Wheeler all over again. And here I thought that I was done with him.

Even now, after all these years, Joey still has the same headstrong aura about him. But now he has everything else to back it up. He now has the money, the connections, the experience. Joey must be successful. He would not be able to attend this prestigious gala of businessmen if he wasn't one himself. But that makes no sense.

The thought of Joey rising to my range of status rattles me to my core. This isn't _my_ Joey… my _old_ Joey.

I know that the blond has it in him to be successful. After all, I dated the man for about four years and knew what he was capable of. And it doesn't hurt that Joey's intelligence or drive aren't lacking.

The thing that rattles me is the fact that I _didn't_ know about Joey's climb to the top.

I put two fingers on my temple, quickly calculating.

_If_ Joey was a successful businessman then I would have heard about it. I am up to date on all of the goings on of those who are important in the business world; national or foreign. So the fact that I, Seto Kaiba, renowned CEO of KaibaCorp, didn't know about this change of Joey's status bothers me.

Another change that upsets me was a set of looks in my ex-lover's eyes. I hadn't noticed them until now. Until I saw them in his golden eyes. They look at me with slight worry. Normally when my fingers meet my temple I either have a headache or I'm figuring out a problem. He knows this. And he is worried. But there is something else there in his eyes: Longing.

The blond man eye's seem to plead with me; asking me to sweep him off his feet; to make him fall in love with the me again.

But, as soon as these looks surface from underneath the golden orbs, they vanish. They were there for just a moment. And that fact tears at my heart.

Is he trying to forget how much I lov—used to love him?

I used to live for that look in Joey's eyes. The look that just screamed love and caring. A look that I had only ever received from Joey. Other than my younger brother, Joey was the only one to ever truly cared for me, loved me.

But now, it was just a ghost of a reality. Only to live on in my memory.

With the loving looks gone, their replacement was not something that I ever expected. Not from Joey, anyway. It is a look of even-acceptance; almost like Joey doesn't care either way if I'm here or not. It's new, yet has a ring of something that I'm used to. It is a look that the blond man had picked up _from_ me. And one that he learned to perfect _without_ me.

I want the first look back. The one I used to wake up to every morning. Love. I want it again. 'You never realize what you had until it's gone.' I don't believe in maxims, but I guess they do have some merit to them.

I step closer to Joey, and softly clear my throat in attempt to moisten it. This causes him to look over at me. And we continue to stare at each other for a few seconds.

I know that I, we, can take this staring contest only for so long before one of us breaks.

… I just hope it is not myself that ends up breaking. Again.

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><p>~Part One end~<p>

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><p>AN: And that's the end of part one! Just so you all know, these parts are meant to be short. I like the feel of it. ^^

Please review/comment or leave con-crit! Part Two will be uploaded in a few hours. So don't worry! :3


	2. Part Two

Disclaimer: I don't own any part of Yuugioh. I only own my ideas (and my YGO DVDs).

Pairing: Seto/Katsuya (kind of?)

Warning: Ficlet, Shonen-ai, very slightly OOC?

Timeline note: This ficlet is set about 10+ years after YGO:DM.

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><p><strong>Only For So Long<strong>

Part Two

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><p>The word 'damn' falls from my lips easier than it had six years ago. Ever since my last breakup. Crap, no, Joey, don't think about that. He might show up if you think about that.<p>

I'm not paranoid; I just see him everywhere.

Great, that doesn't make me seem paranoid at all.

I clear my throat as I make my way though black suits and sluttish evening gowns. I'm trying to find a waiter who is carrying the drink I want.

Then I do a double-take, and look though the crowd. No, that can't be him. I'm just seeing things. I shake my head and continue my search for a waiter.

Damn, I can't seem to escape these rich bastards. The black suits are everywhere, and even though I should be used to these stupid parties by now, I'm really not. No amount of exposure can get a normal person used to these things. You would have to be born into them… like him. Shit!

No, stop thinking about him. You'll jinks yourself into seeing him if you keep thinking about him.

I'm not normally this paranoid. Or anxious. It's just these business parties. They bring out the worst in me. It's kind of like reliving my past. Over, and over again.

Great, now I have a headache.

I squint my eyes and rub my temples a bit as I walk past a waiter, and finally spot the drink I want. Ginger ale is so hard to find at these parties. Especially when it's put into the same flutes as the champagne. I have been trying to give up all liquor after my relationship with him. Looking back, those years with him were some of the worst years in my life. Things happened that I don't want to experience ever again. Horrible things.

I take a sip as my eyes lazily gaze around the room. And then I nearly spit out my drink. There, in between the crowd was the one person who I, Joey Wheeler, wasn't expecting to see. Correction: The one person who I was hoping to all the gods that I wouldn't have to come across ever again.

I discreetly wipe my mouth, and place the ginger ale on the passing tray to switch it out with something stronger. Vodka should do the trick.

I start to take a drink, and over the top of my glass I notice him. There's no escaping it now. He's seen me, and like a person possessed he makes his way over to me. I need to get air.

Maybe if I go on the balcony I can loose him. There are always people out there during these parties. All of them attempting to get away from the fake appearances that they have to keep. Somehow the fresh air can make them feel less fake.

I discreetly look over my shoulder. Shit, he's still following me. Time to loose him.

As I make my way over to the outdoor balcony, I try to take a route crowed with people in a vain attempt to lose him. And just for sure measure, I keep looking behind me every few feet. Good, he's not behind me. Then, to make sure that he doesn't notice my face, I turn my back to the party and gently lean against the thick banister to face the ornate flower and topiary garden.

Even though it is true that I have not actually seen my ex-lover face to face in over six years, it doesn't mean that I don't keep tabs on his business. I know almost all of the ins and outs of KaibaCorp. I just don't keep tabs on Kaiba himself. Too much pain associated with that. So, I wasn't prepared to see him to show up in America. Lesson learned.

Even though I don't expect to see Kaiba at these extravagant business parties in America, I always prepare, always steel himself, for the possibility of talking to, or at least seeing, Kaiba again. Not a pleasant experience. Especially when I have to go to these things fairly often.

Needless to say that it is a horrific surprise to see him here. He is supposed to be in Japan, where he belongs.

Far away from me.

There must be a secret merger, or Kaiba finally decided to expand to America. Shit! If he's expanding then all of the planning might be ruined. I might not be able to beat 'the great Seto Kaiba' at his own game.

And after that hell he put me though.

Shit-damn-monkey fuck!

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><p>~Part Two end~<p>

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><p>AN: Gah! I'm so so so sorry for the wait! D: It was my birthday this past weekend (3.11) and so I totally forgot to update. I'm a horrible person.

At any rate, here is Part Two! Do you all hate me yet? :3


	3. Part Three

Disclaimer: I don't own any part of Yuugioh. I only own my ideas (and my YGO DVDs).

Pairing: Seto/Katsuya (kind of?)

Warning: Ficlet, Shonen-ai, very slightly OOC?

Timeline note: This ficlet is set about 10+ years after YGO:DM.

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><p><strong>Only For So Long<strong>

Part Three 

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><p>The two men just stared at each other for a moment. Both had their backs straight, reaching their full heights. Thoughts ran through their heads.<p>

They were all alone on the outdoor balcony, and Seto was thankful for that. No one to see him just standing there, staring at the other male. No one to see him possibly mess up. No one to see him possibly break.

Joey, on the other hand, was restless and uneasy about the fact that there wasn't anyone else outside. Where had they all gone? There was a giant crowd just a second ago. The crowd had made him feel safe. Now he felt alone. He felt isolated. He felt that he was going to be his own undoing, and say things that he was going to regret later.

To vent his nerves, the blond man started to finger his pants pocket with his thumb. He had learned long ago that shoving his hands into his pockets, like he used to, was not a 'strong' response at these dinner parties. It would send the wrong message. It said that he was uneasy, and therefore he didn't belong. Even though Joey didn't want to belong, he knew that for everyone's sakes he had to at least act like he did. He was a powerful businessman, for heaven sakes. Even though he felt weak now.

After he worried his pocket for a few seconds more, Joey relented and shoved his fingers though his hair. Old nervous habits die hard. Then, not being able to take the silence, the blond leaned against the marble railing behind him.

It was then that Joey noticed the look on Seto's face, it was the look that meant that Seto was about to start working on a problem. Joey just had to wait a second and, in true form, Seto closed his eyes and took a quick breath. _'Right on queue. You haven't changed at all,'_ Joey thought.

Then, just as Seto opened his eyes, it dawned on Joey that he had started to fall for his ex-lover again. _'No, I can't. Not after all the bullshit and years of lying to me.'_

All it took was a soft whisper of "Joey" from Seto's lips, and all the anger and hatred from six years ago came rushing back to Joey.

Seto had 'fallen in love' with Joey as a publicity stunt, mainly to raise stocks. Some stupid idea that the Public Relations department at KaibaCorp had thought up. Females in Japan love their gay pretty-boys, and considering that females were an untapped market for a Japanese video game and electronics company like KaibaCorp, it was only natural that they would try to wrangle the females by appealing to them how ever they could.

But did Joey know that it was meant to be a farce? No. All of the feelings that he had for Seto all those years ago were real. And, by the end of it all, it had been real for Seto too. But he had never told that to Joey.

And so to Joey all of it had been fake. In Joey's eyes, every touch, every kiss, every 'I love you' had been planned by KaibaCorp. Even the moment when Joey left Seto was part of the stunt. All to raise the stocks.

So it was then that all of the memories and all of the anger came thundering back to Joey the second that Seto said his name.

"It's 'Wheeler' to you," Joey snapped.

Seto's eyebrows furrowed together, "Joey, don't be like this—"

Joey openly scoffed at the response, "After all the shit you pulled, you're lucky I'm still standing here talking to you." And then the blond man crossed his arms over his chest in a defiant manner.

"I see my apology never lessened your anger," and Seto shifted his weight, tempted to look down. Joey's hardened gaze was almost too much for him.

"Why would it?" Joey's eyes narrowed dangerously, "It was bullshit anyway. Probably something your P.R. team cooked up to 'get us back together.'"

The brunette was taken back. He knew Joey must have been angry with how things ended between them, but Seto never imagined that there would be this much resentment left over, "Yes, when it all started, it was fake, but in the end what I felt for you was real, and so was that apology."

What Kaiba didn't realize was that he had betrayed Joey's trust for almost four straight years. And that was why the blond refused to forgive him. Joey wasn't one to forgive and forget something of that magnitude.

"Psh, you can't love, Kaiba. You don't have it in you to actually care about anything other than your precious KaibaCorp. But you know what? The last thing that you care about is going to be taken from you. Your brother is practically handing the company over to me."

Seto was rattled, "You talked to Moki?"

"I _talk_ to him, yes. At least once a week. Unlike you, I actually care about your little brother. _You_ drove us away, Kaiba, and now _we'll_ take away your company."

"Liar," Seto's face was stern and a there was a spark of hatred that blazed in his eyes, "You don't talk to Mokuba."

"Just because he doesn't talk to you anymore, don't mean he doesn't talk to me. You really pulled a number on him too, Kaiba. It was one thing to run me away; I was just a lover. A fake one, but just a lover. But Mokuba? _He's your own flesh and blood_; he's your brother! And the only family you had left. And you ran him away!" Joey was livid and the rage in his eyes told all.

"Bullshit! That little bastard didn't want me anymore. Kat's my family now."

"Oh, Kat, huh? That's what you call that fake bitch you married four years ago? I thought her full name was Katherine. About five foot nine, blonde hair, golden-hazel eyes? A.K.A. your stupid little replacement for me!"

It was Kaiba's turn to cross his arms and scoff, "It looks like you've been paying too much attention to the lies from the media."

"Right, because _she_ decided to bleach her red hair blonde. Because _she_ decided to get hazel contacts. I bet you even made sure to find a girl with my personality too. Face it, Kaiba, you're a _sick fuck_."

"No, I'm not." Seto stood firm, and his eyes glared. But on the inside he was being torn apart.

"Really? Ok, well, let's say that you _didn't_ create this female version of me. What did you used to call me when we were dating? 'Puppy,' wasn't it? And what do you call your wife-whore? Cat?"

Seto's mouth stated to go dry as Joey continued to rant.

"Just the opposite of what you used to call me, huh? Coincidence? I bet 'Katherine' isn't even her real name."

"No!"

"You tried to turn me into your puppet when we were dating, but I rebelled or you got tired of me. Or maybe the 'gay fad' changed! Hell if I know, I wasn't coherent enough after four years of the rapid alcoholism that _you_ pushed me to, that I don't even remember anymore!"

"I didn't do that to you! You did that to yourself!"

"Really? You had _nothing_ do to with the fact that everything I consumed _just so happened_ to be laced with something alcoholic?" The words on the blond's lips tasted bitter from all the horrid memories. "Do you _really _still think that since I couldn't take the pressure of being the pampered, gay lover of a billionaire, I turned to alcohol? Right. Because _me_, the one who survived being a gang member and street punk in school, would almost try to _kill myself_ by drinking myself into a comatose state? _Fuck that_."

Joey saw that Seto was breaking; that Seto's mind was turning off from all the bad things that had happened to the blond. But Joey wasn't finished with Seto just yet. He had yet to make his point.

"We could have been something, Seto. _Something real._ I hope you know that. But instead you had to blow it all away, and pretend to love me. Just because of your company. Well, you can't save your company now." And an evil glint sparkled in the honey eyes, "I climbed the business ladder, and now I'm engaged to a wealthy businessman's daughter. I met her in grad school here, in America. I had to prove myself to her father—which was easier than dating you—and now I'm his right-hand man for a lot of ventures."

Seto was wracking his brain, 'This can't be right. How did I not know about this?'

"Even though I really loved you, do you know why I ended up leaving?" There was no happy nostalgia in his voice, only disgust. "I could take it only for so long before I was about to break," a sigh, "So I left before I broke, before I died." And then Joey smiled, but there was no mirth in his grin. It was one of pure hate. "But you know what, Seto? You're going to be the one to break this time. And I'm going to be the one laughing as you suffer." 

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><p>~END~ <p>

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><p>AN: So yeah. That's the end. Pissed Jou is pissed, and he's going to enact his revenge. In my headcanon for this fic the events that happened while these two were together were enough to almost drive Jou over the edge with insanity. And since he had years to dwell on those memories, he kind of just wanted revenge more than anything. I also think that he picked up a few things from Kaiba on how to be evil and bitter. Or that's how I hope it came across. On Jou's exterior, I wanted him to mirror a lot of Seto's famous cold and calculating attributes. I wanted him to take no prisoners. Kind of how Seto is in Season 0 and the beginning of Duel Monsters. But on the inside, I wanted poor Jou to be almost freaking out. Jou is actually very skittish and almost superstitious in canon, but when he's put against something that he _needs _to defeat, he faces it and doesn't back down. And then for Seto, I wanted him to be truly hurt, but not properly able to express that pain vocally. Hence the reason why you don't really hear much from him in this part. In my general headcanon for Seto, no matter how many years he is with someone, or how much therapy he has, he is never fully able to vocally express his feelings. Yes, Seto can express his negative feelings very well, but when it comes to the more positive ones, he's kind of at a loss. I see him more of almost wanting to be able to fully express his feelings, but never quite able to get there. And so he's just kind of awkward sometimes. Heh, poor baby. I love him, I really do.

Anyway. Sorry for the long Author Note. I-I really didn't mean to do that. But yeah, I felt that I should almost explain my headcanon for this plot since you guys are only getting the '6 years later' bit, and not experiencing all the turmoil that I imagine that happened.

On that note, I hope you all enjoyed. Please review, fav, and possibly check out my other fics! I'm hoping to be more active now that I'm out of college, married, and have a job. :3


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